March 6, 2003

• Bono never looked so good to daddy.

  
  

  “Sometimes, the male bonobos engage in penis fencing, then they’d cum and fall asleep.” -Quote from my friend’s Human Sexuality class.

  
  

  Alrighty… on a much much much lighter tone, I’m going to move on to something a bit more light hearted than the previous entry. Thanks for y’all who commented. Oh, this entry is a bit obscene for those people who are ig’nant and immature.

  
  

  Ok, if you’re a guy imagine you get in a heated argument with your guy friend. To make up, you say, “Dude… I’m sorry, bro. Let me rub my balls against your ass.” And he allows you to do so. “Shit dude… that feels good.”

  
  

  Or imagine if you’re a gal and you get in a cat fight with your best girlfriend. To reestablish your best friend forever status, you say “I’m like totally sorry. Lets rub our poons together.” Then you squeal in orgasmic delight.

  
  

  Sounds like utopia, eh? Well, the bonobos monkeys have it all figured out. Watching a PBS special on these muhnkees, I was amazed to watch little Sue licking her mother’s clitoris after she threw a stick at her. Needless to say, I became interested.

  
  

  Slightly smaller than their chimpanzee friends, these Bonobos exist with each other in a cohesive orgy within the sauna like conditions of the African forests. Much less aggressive then their Chimpazee cousins, these monkeys prefer to make love, not war. After a dispute, these monkeys would come together for a hug and a mouth-to-mouth kiss. Hm, imagine this excerpt in a British accent:

  
  

  “The diversity of erotic contacts in bonobos includes sporadic oral sex, massage of another individual’s genitals and intense tongue-kissing. Lest this leave the impression of a pathologically oversexed species, I must add, based on hundreds of hours of watching bonobos, that their sexual activity is rather casual and relaxed. It appears to be a completely natural part of their group life. Like people, bonobos engage in sex only occasionally, not continuously. Furthermore, with the average copulation lasting 13 seconds, sexual contact in bonobos is rather quick by human standards.”

  
  

  http://songweaver.com/info/bonobos.html

  
  

  Imagine, for a moment, if our great leaders of this world were Bonobos. “I’m sorry, Saddam for forcing you to dismantle your missles,” chortled Bush. “Let me rub my nutsak against your hairy ass.” Then we probably wouldn’t have this problem with impending war, and the dependency of foreign oil issues and what not. Anyway…

  
  

  To speak further along the lines of “unnatural” practices amongst animals, do you remember hearing that story about dem gay penguins who lived in Brooklyn? Well, if you haven’t, the two love birds, Wendell and Cess, have been a happy couple in the Brooklyn Zoo. Reading up about them, I came across this small article about the penguins. Here’s an excerpt:

  
  

  How do Wendell and Cass have sex?

  
  

  They’re doing the same thing as a male and female would, though obviously not producing any eggs. But the copulation is the same. I can give you specific details …

  
  

  Go ahead.

  
  

  Penguins are birds and all the sexual organs are on the inside of their bodies — it’s called the cloaca. The urogenital opening is where they defecate as well as have sex. It’s just this little hole in their rump area.

  
  

  And it’s called the cloacal kiss: What happens is that the female will lay on her belly and the male climbs on top with his feet and puts his rump around her rump and their cloacas meet each other, and then the sperm gets transferred into the female.

  
  

  So Wendell and Cass do the same thing.

  
  

  Right. Just without the eggs.

  
  

  http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2002/03/08/gay_penguins/index2.html

  
  

  Here’s a CNN video about the matter for your benefit. Or it’s because you believe I’m full of shit:

  
  

  http://www.cnn.com/video/us/2002/02/19/jm.gay.penguins.cmdy.med.html

  
  

  I do have a point to all of this.

  
  

  I find it extremely interesting that there are queer animals within the animal kingdom, other than Richard Simmons and Tom Cruise. When I think about the Bonobos monkeys, Wendell and Cess, and all those other homo animals, I can’t help but think, “Hey, maybe there is some sort of biological component in regards to homosexuality. Hot dog!” If animals are consistently seen as lacking the intellectual thought process of reasoning, and if they act purely out of instinct, wouldn’t homosexual animals only promote the idea that homosexual homosapiens are just acting out of natural functions of desire? Is it an example of natural selection? Am I making any sense?

  
  

  I dunno… I’m sort of out of it right now. I think I’ll stop.  

  
  

  If your interested in an article about a book based on gay animals, here’s a link that talks about it:   http://www.salon.com/it/feature/1999/03/cov_15featurea.html

  • 1:41 pm
  • 10 Comments